The narrative surrounding Edoardo, Carmela, and Teresa offers a portrait of relationships where toxic love, symbolic violence, and control are either normalized or challenged, depending on each character’s social and cultural experiences. Each of them embodies a distinct emotional habitus, shaped by their background and relational expectations.

From the storyline, we learn that Edoardo and Carmela meet through their best friends, Rosa and Ciro Ricci, siblings from a Camorra family that adopts Carmela after she becomes orphaned. Edoardo, a criminal affiliated with the Camorra, has been imprisoned multiple times. His role in the relationship reflects a dominant masculinity: overbearing, irresponsible, and incapable of managing complex emotions. For Edoardo, “Carmela is someone who solves problems”8, a role reduced to traditional domesticity: the devoted wife, the reliable mother, the emotional anchor. She represents stability but requires no introspection or emotional commitment from him. This relationship dynamic is built on gendered emotional work, where the practical and affective burdens are entirely placed on the woman.

Carmela, in turn, accepts this role and rationalizes it as part of her identity and destiny. She states: “He gave me a family, a mother, a home”, forms of security in her orphan condition, emphasizing how her concept of love is rooted in material security and social stability in the absence of alternatives. Carmela’s subordination is also evident in her response to Edoardo’s infidelity: “He can forget me as a partner, but he cannot forget that I am the mother of his child.” She accepts suffering as inevitable, sacrificing her well-being for the sake of her child and the preservation of a predetermined family structure. Her emotional habitus aligns with rigid gender norms, where submission is not only normalized but idealized as a feminine virtue and a necessary sacrifice.

A contrasting emotional habitus is embodied by Teresa, a ceramics workshop volunteer in the prison, with whom Edoardo falls in love. Teresa comes from an upper-class background and initially succumbs to Edoardo’s advances but later distances herself upon recognizing his violent tendencies. Her emotional habitus is fundamentally different: she has internalized emotional self-regulation, rationality, and autonomy. Initially intrigued by Edoardo’s exuberant demeanor, she experiences internal conflicts stemming from class incompatibility. However, once she discovers he has a partner and child, she reverts to her original habitus, prioritizing self-respect and loyalty. Her statement: “I know my worth, and I didn’t deserve the way he treated me,” marks the turning point of her emotional detachment. Teresa’s decision to leave Edoardo underscores a stark contrast to Carmela’s submission, her emotional habitus prioritizes self-respect, rational emotion management, dialogue, and consent over impulse and passion.

Carmela is aware of her emotional subordination to Edoardo, yet she does not perceive it as unjust or as a form of symbolic violence. Her role as a “woman” in the relationship, which she herself describes as inevitably subordinate, reflects an emotional habitus in which a woman’s identity is tied to being an “object of love” and a mother. She states: “All it takes is a ring… and the promise of a lifetime together, and I break down,” highlighting how love and emotional stability are her only avenues for fulfillment, in alignment with the social expectations of her subculture.

Edoardo, conversely, is fully aware of his position of power, a man for whom everything is permitted and forgiven. His emotional habitus, shaped by street life and criminal dynamics, normalizes emotional deviance within his subculture, where male infidelity and parental disengagement are not insurmountable conflicts, but ordinary relational behaviors. His ability to maintain parallel relationships with Carmela and Teresa, without apparent remorse, constitutes a form of symbolic violence, not only toward the women involved but also toward himself, as it perpetuates his emotional detachment and lack of accountability.

In this section, I will elaborate on how the mentioned character embodies emotional habitus archetypes. Edoardo, a member of the subaltern deviant class, exhibits emotional habitus traits of dominance and control manifested in ambivalence between detachment and jealousy. He identifies his gender role in hegemonic masculinity. Carmela, also from the subaltern class, possesses emotional habitus traits of submission and sacrifice, which are evident in self-blaming and suffering. She identifies her gender role in maternity and affective dependence. Teresa, belonging to the upper dominant class, embodies emotional habitus traits of reflexivity and rationality, characterized by autonomy and detachment. She identifies her gender role in emancipated femininity.

The immense popularity of “Mare Fuori”, particularly on TikTok, has transformed characters like Edoardo and Ciro into icons. In viral videos, they are labeled as “malaises” (#malessere): charismatic, handsome, jealous, and possessive, traits that are often romanticized. In the music industry, artists such as Fabiana, Matteo Paolillo, Guè, Tony Effe, and Baby Gang have capitalized on the theme of “malaise”, generating millions of views. The song “M’piace o’ malesser” (I like the malaise) by Fabiana (2.6 million views on TikTok) has influenced musical and cultural trends, reinforcing the desirability of the malessere figure.

An accurate depiction of this cultural archetype is provided by Fabiana in her song “Malessere”, where she glorifies the “bad boy”: tall, muscular, tattooed, ignorant, rude, potentially violent, possessive, jealous, and capable of making his partners suffer, but loved precisely for these traits.

“I want him to show up on a motorcycle / Under my balcony, even at one in the morning /To get jealous, even in front of people / If another man looks at me / I like the ‘Malessere’/That guy who causes trouble at night /Then leaves to go dancing / I want the ‘Malessere,’ with tattoos and a long beard—hot!/ But what can I do? I like the ‘Malessere’/ The kind of guy who starts fights / If I go out with my friends” (author’s translation)

Both in its lyrics and visual aesthetics, the song centers around an idealized notion of “virile” masculinity, characterized by possessiveness, obsessive jealousy, control, and symbolic violence. These behaviors are romanticized and framed as desirable traits, blurring the boundary between love and abuse.

The term “Malaise” is emblematic: it does not signify emotional distress to be resolved but rather a set of characteristics that embody toxic and dominant masculinity. The man described in the song controls what the woman wears, dictates where she can go, and reacts violently to any interaction she has with other men. This model is further reinforced through visual aesthetics in the music video, which draws inspiration from the 1950s American housewife archetype, evoking female subordination within an idealized system of male dominance. Symbols such as long beards and tattoos, commonly associated with criminal subcultures and “system boys”, add another layer of cultural identification, linking attraction to power, danger, and rebellion (Ravveduto 2023). These elements construct a cultural framework in which women do not seek emancipation from a mafia-influenced context but rather actively support, desire, and sustain men who represent, protect, and enforce it.

Fabiana’s song builds a narrative where violent behaviors are reframed as symptoms of love, such as jealousy and possessiveness. She is not alone in this: similar themes appear in other songs like “Malessere” by Matteo Paolillo (who plays Edoardo in “Mare Fuori”) featuring Guè:

“I made you understand that I was the malessere / We go out late, so the streets are empty / You know when we pass by, everyone turns to look, I look like a Saracen / A cigarette in my mouth, hands in my pockets/ Swaggering through the city/ Some people come out just to meet me/ And their heart stops if they see me walk by” (author’s translation)

Many of these songs intertwine love and violence, portraying relationships that oscillate between extreme passion and absolute control. For instance, “Si o malessere mij” by Benny G includes references to murder out of jealousy: “I tell everyone you’re mine / I’ll kill you if you lie to me/ I’ll do like Rosa Ricci/ This is a criminal love.” (Rosa Ricci is a criminal character of “Mare fuori”). Similarly, Carmine di Tommaso’s “O’ Malessere” states: “I am a criminal for this love / For you, I am a malessere/ You think you’re the only one suffering, but I suffer for you too/ You are mine and no one else’s/ I would steal the moon to make you happy.”

Songs also incorporate elements of ghosting, social media control, and unpredictability, as in “Malessere” by Renato Biancardi, where the man blocks his

partner on WhatsApp, watches her Instagram stories without following her, never calls, likes other women’s posts, and then suddenly contacts her at 4 AM. The music video contains references to “Mare fuori”, reinforcing the connection between these themes and the malessere archetype.

A notable song revival is “Malessere” by Rosy Rey, a cover of the original track by Mauro Nardi. In Nardi’s version, the man addresses his “malessere” woman, describing her as a source of suffering and desire. Rosy Rey, however, inverts the perspective, portraying a woman who accuses the man of causing her pain while confessing her inability to leave him. The lyrics compare him to a disease, a toxic and inescapable bond: “You put me on the cross like Jesus Christ / You are both sugar and poison.” The music video portrays a violent gendered relationship marked by frequent fights and emotional tension, with a domestic setting that highlights the intimacy and inescapability of these conflicts, framing them as an emotional (and physical) prison. Many artists openly link love to crime, often declaring a willingness to die, go to prison, or kill for love. For example, in “Everyday” by Geolier featuring Anna, Shiva, Takagi & Ketra, the lyrics state: “I’ll kill you just because you talk to her /And you’ll kill me just because I talk to her.”

Some songs, like “Femmena Bugiarda” (Lier women) by Franco Ricciardi, introduce the female counterpart of the malessere: the “malessere woman”, depicted as manipulative, jealous, unstable, yet irresistible. Similarly, Joka Dablo’s “Malessere” presents this woman as dominant and destabilizing, triggering jealousy and conflict while fostering intense emotional dependency. The “malessere woman” is simultaneously an object of fear and desire, aligning with the femme fatale archetype, a patriarchal stereotype that reduces women to either angels or demons, limiting their complexity as social subjects (Kristeva 1980).

Across popular, trap, and neomelodic music, emotional norms reinforce the glorification of jealousy, control, and violence as expressions of love and masculinity. This perpetuates the idea that men must be dominant while women must accept control as proof of love. The emotional habitus portrayed in these lyrics and videos normalizes male aggression and delegates emotional labor to women, who are expected to be understanding, nurturing, and emotionally self-sacrificing. For men, this emotional habitus suppresses emotions like vulnerability or fear, promoting strength, control, and jealousy as desirable traits linked to patriarchal masculinity. The romanticization of toxic relationships and female devotion to suffering reinforces a collective imaginary where pain, jealousy, and violence are rebranded as passionate love. Within commercial popular music culture, jealousy and possession are equated with authentic love, reinforcing patriarchal models where male control is normalized and female emotions are dismissed as unstable and subordinate. Passion-driven love is thus framed as an excuse for violent or controlling behavior, presenting it as natural and inevitable.

TikTok has emerged as a globally accessible and inclusive digital space, enabling popular participation and amplifying marginalized voices, particularly those who previously lacked access to cultural production (van Dijck 2013; Zuo & Wang 2019; Boffone 2022). The dominance of Gen Z (born 2000–2014) in both content creation and consumption (Doyle 2022) has transformed TikTok into a narrative space for intimate relationships, where users document their experiences, reflections, and expectations, offering a window into contemporary social dynamics.

Among the curated TikTok content, songs, couple skits, and ads for the malessere aesthetic reveal how this archetype has evolved into a consumer style. A dataset of 70 high-engagement profiles (men, women, and heterosexual couples aged 20–30) highlights self-celebration, branding strategies (Arvidsson 2005), viral trend exploitation, performative attitudes, and scripted couple scenarios.

For male users, the malessere prototype is built on rigid gender norms, portrayed with detailed irony: stylized haircuts, specific fashion choices, and physical fitness are linked to sexual desirability and dominant masculinity. TikTok reinforces a male emotional habitus where virility is associated with control and dominance, emphasizing aggression and jealousy as attractive traits. The settings of the videos include intimate narratives of romantic relationships and take place in everyday contexts such as cars, homes, streets, shops, and even bedrooms. Partners record themselves exchanging kisses, getting ready to go out, and, in some cases, simulating sexual acts, sometimes without dialogue and with trap music playing in the background.

As declared in Tiktok videos, many women explicitly express a desire for relationships with the #malessere. This aspiration, shared through monologues or ironic confessions, is linked to a feminine emotional habitus that normalizes violent relational dynamics: young women idealize jealous and possessive men, interpreting these traits as signs of care and love, in a pattern resembling emotional dependence.

Couple profiles narrate everyday scenes that alternate between intimacy and tension, addressing themes such as economic violence and possessiveness. Some recurring trends emerge: for instance, control over women’s clothing and, more broadly, their bodies. In one video from the selection, a partner rips up his girlfriend’s clothes, deeming them too provocative, while shouting aggressive orders: “che rè stu cos? stracc stu cos! straccia! jamm a vrè! mo mittatil accusì!» (What is this? Tear it up! Tear up this thing! Let’s see, now put it on like this [torn]).

Another recurrent trend is the “Can I do this?” format, in which a girl asks her boyfriend what she is allowed to do in his absence: e.g., sleeping over at a friend’s house, borrowing a hoodie from a male friend, posting a picture in a swimsuit, going out dancing with her friends, only to receive consistently negative responses.

In some videos, women react aggressively to oppressive behaviors, a response that is also perceived as acceptable within a dynamic that, in practice, does not alter the fundamental structure of the relationship.

On TikTok, the prototype of the #malessere man becomes a recognizable stereotype, which can be described through a behavioral decalogue. Some TikTokers illustrate this relational model through lists: the partner who initially pursues and then disappears,

who gives extravagant gifts, offers luxury but ultimately controls his partner in every aspect, from clothing (not too provocative or seductive, to the point of tearing apart prohibited outfits) to friendships and even monitoring private messages on her phone. Within this context, the “malaise” represents a toxic relationship characterized by a continuous cycle of promises and disillusionment, generating insecurity, anxiety, and emotional dependence.

Media both reflect and actively shape social reality, constructing power relations and cultural dynamics. Studying the collective imagination means analyzing narrative and visual flows, influenced by the meaning-making process of media texts, and driven by non-rational and sensory engagement, which mediates the interaction between individuals and the collective (Ragone 2015).

Through a critical analysis of Mare Fuori, one of Italy’s most popular TV series in recent years, and the viral TikTok #malessere trend, this study examined the mediatized representation of a recurring cultural topos: the beautiful and damned. It investigates how a media phenomenon can be both a reflection of reality and a space where reality is actively constructed and negotiated, either reinforcing or challenging existing social dynamics, shaping how people relate and express emotions (Hall 1980). The beautiful and damned figure, rooted in literary and cinematic traditions from Narcissus, Don Giovanni, and Faust to Heathcliff, Fitzgerald’s Gatsby, and James Dean (Fitzgerald 2011; Dal Monte 2021), problematizes men’s attraction to destruction. This archetypal hero, both charming and self-destructive, embodies ambiguous, rebellious, and dangerous traits, symbolizing hegemonic masculinity and the enduring association between power, deviance, and attraction. This type of media representation often reinforces toxic masculinity, characterized by aggression, dominance, and the rejection of emotions considered “feminine”, positioning such behaviors as integral to romantic relationships and traditional gender roles (Connell & Messerschmidt 2005; Banet-Weiser 2018). Cinema and television frequently depict male aggression as a sign of strength and virility (Harris 2015).

Emotional and psychological violence in heterosexual relationships, primarily perpetrated by men, remains underrepresented in the media compared to physical forms of abuse. However, it persists precisely because it is embedded in cultural archetypes and reinforced through dominant discourses (Bettaglio et al. 2018, p.10). Desire and attraction are also shaped by patriarchal emotional habitus.

For instance, the #malessere archetype in “Mare Fuori” and TikTok is built on an emotional habitus that centers romantic relationships around jealousy and anger, exercised through control and possessiveness over the female partner. These traits are so

normalized and accepted that they become markers of desirability.

In “Mare Fuori”, romantic relationships are a significant narrative element and are frequently intertwined with organized crime dynamics. The emotions linked to #malessere include symbolic and physical violence, which is justified as part of a passionate love where control and dominance are central. These emotions are intrinsically tied to an archetypal patriarchal masculinity, where vulnerability is repressed, and strength becomes the primary mode of emotional expression.

This behavior manifests in a cycle of ghosting, social media surveillance, and overt aggression, reinforcing the idea of a “strong” yet ultimately dysfunctional man, incapable of processing complex emotions. Through Edoardo’s character and his “damned” aesthetic, emotional deviance is transformed into a culturally diffused and idealized phenomenon, supporting a cultural framework that encourages violence as a marker of virility and dominance.

The success of this narrative is not solely tied to the engaging plot and complex characters of the series. Instead, it is also linked to the virality of TikTok content, which has transformed “Mare Fuori”’s male characters into cultural symbols of an ideology as problematic as it is appealing.

Applying the concept of emotional habitus to the study of media phenomena, examining “Mare Fuori”, music trends, and TikTok videos, reveals how the collective imagination constructs and diffuses social norms and emotional hierarchies through diverse communication languages.

The male malessere emotional habitus is structured around a relational model that links strength and control to desirability, transforming dysfunctional emotions and behaviors into idealized traits of masculinity. The key emotional patterns in this habitus include: jealousy as proof of love and passion, expressed through obsessive and possessive behaviors; irritability and anger, triggered by real or imagined threats, reinforcing the image of a passionate, impulsive man; contempt for vulnerability, where emotional fragility is repressed and replaced by displays of strength, often through aggression; frustration, often resulting from an inability to sustain stable relationships, leading to self-sabotaging behaviors such as ghosting or infidelity. The behaviors associated with this habitus revolve around control as an assertion of dominance, manifesting in surveillance of the female partner, including control over her body, clothing, and social interactions and emotional manipulation, fostering dependency through cycles of affection and rejection. Conversely, the emotional habitus of women involved with #malessere men is rooted in affective subordination and the normalization of suffering as part of love. The key emotional patterns include humiliation and submission, where control and jealousy are interpreted as signs of care and attention; idealization of sacrifice, viewing personal suffering as proof of authentic love, normalizing tolerance toward symbolic or physical violence; guilt, making women feel responsible for relationship conflicts or failures; hope for change, which sustains tolerance toward patriarchal behaviors; internal conflict, between the desire for freedom and the emotional bonds that keep them in the relationship.

This affective dependency leads women to remain in toxic relationships despite abuse or lack of reciprocity.

An intriguing aspect of emotional habitus is its ambivalence: it functions both as an implicit guide for social action and as a constraint that limits individual possibilities, yet it also creates marginal spaces—liminal moments—when an individual is temporarily pushed outside their habitual framework. This occurs, for instance, in interclass interactions or during the transient adoption of different lifestyles.

The two protagonists, Edoardo and Carmela, embody an emotional habitus in which masculinity is synonymous with control and dominance, while femininity is defined by submission and self-sacrifice for the family. In contrast, Teresa represents an opposing character, expressing an emotional habitus that prioritizes autonomy and self-respect. However, she momentarily deviates from this norm when she explores a relationship with Edoardo. This deviation is temporary, as Teresa ultimately reverts to her original emotional habitus in response to Edoardo’s betrayal and deception.

Edoardo and Teresa’s storyline symbolically narrates an experience of “temporary deviance” from one’s original habitus, which may generate a sense of freedom. However, this sensation remains superficial and ephemeral. Ultimately, individuals remain anchored to their internalized dispositions, and their return to their original habitus, often unconsciously, results in a forced realignment with the roles and norms imposed by their social environment.

This dialectic between perceived freedom and social obligation reflects the broader structures of gender, class, age, ethnicity, and other privilege categories, providing a key analytical lens for understanding the tensions that pervade intimate relationships.

Although fictional, this relationship triangle mirrors real dynamics of power and affective dependence, offering insights into contemporary sentimental phenomena.

The analyzed songs encode the love-suffering binary into music and lyrics, often employing a direct, non-poetic, and non-metaphorical language. Neomelodic and trap music articulate the emotional habitus characterized by jealousy, possessiveness, impulsivity, and passion. Fabiana celebrates malessere as a masculine ideal, reinforcing control and jealousy as signs of passion and devotion. Rosy Rey, on the other hand, reverses the perspective, depicting a woman’s internal conflict as she suffers for love yet remains unable to leave a toxic relationship.

On TikTok, through a mix of performativity and self-narration, the analyzed videos reveal distinct gendered portrayals of malessere: male profiles construct the malessere archetype through codified aesthetics (clothing, tattoos, arrogant behaviors) and relationship dynamics based on jealousy and control; female profiles, through ironic dialogues and personal confessions, express a desire for the malessere type, thus normalizing subordination as a sign of love;

couple profiles stage arguments, domestic skits, or humorous interactions, often masking dynamics of control and symbolic violence under the guise of entertainment.

Applying the concept of emotional habitus allows for a critical analysis of media as tools of symbolic construction, demonstrating how fiction and digital content contribute to either legitimizing or challenging existing power dynamics.

Here, emotional habitus intersects with algorithmic culture, engaging in a co-production process between social norms and technological structures (Airoldi 2023). The viral nature of TikTok content rapidly establishes a recognizable and replicable cultural grammar, reinforcing (dysfunctional) relational models.

A key finding of this study is the active role of women who choose subordination, having internalized and thus reproduced narratives that oppose feminist or progressive models. These individuals embrace dynamics that exalt corporeality, aggression, and control, rejecting relationships based on reflexivity, consent, dialogue, or equality.

Relationships with the #malessere archetype echo elements of patriarchal romanticism, still deeply rooted in the collective imagination, where passion and conflict intertwine with power and submission.

Irony emerges as a powerful yet dangerous tool: it numbs the brutality of these dynamics, contributing to a framework in which toxic and violent relationships become culturally acceptable models (Bainotti & Semenzin 2021).